I’ve been homeschooling for several years now, and I think of myself as a confident homeschooling parent.
That’s not to say I don’t second guess decisions I make from time to time. I do.
That’s not to say I haven’t full-out embarrassed myself at times. I have.
That’s not to say I don’t have fleeting moments when I wonder if I’d be a better homeschooling parent if…
Those moments are there too.
What I’m saying is I am certain I have what it takes to DO THIS THING called “Homeschooling.”
Where did I gain this confidence?
Experience.
I got knocked down a few times, had my eyes opened a few more times, and through it all, I learned to ask forgiveness, seek help, and trust myself.
Here are 3 ways I’ve learned to be a confident homeschooling parent.
Yours may be different, but think of it like a huge Venn diagram where all of our experiences overlap each other, and maybe you’ll find yourself somewhere in my circle.
1. Be ready to “eat crow.”
If you aren’t familiar with the idiom eating crow it is an American colloquialism describing the humiliation felt when you have to admit how VERY wrong you are after taking a ridiculously strong position.
Oh man, have I ever had to eat crow.
More than once.
Like that time when I arrived at our homeschooling cooperative location, and there were no tables and chairs left in ANY of the rooms where we held classes.
I lost it.
As in, I ranted at the church secretary who, by the way, WAS RECOVERING FROM CHEMOTHERAPY.
I was emotional and dimwitted.
I was the epitome of an out of control, extreme homeschooling momma.
A friend of mine literally PUT HER HANDS ON MY SHOULDERS, looked me in the eye and told me to calm myself down.
Laugh if you want to, judge if you feel the need, and know that I will take it because I deserved it – then.
I was ugly.
U.G.L.Y.
Why? I was stressed because everything wasn’t perfectly set up for the 100+ students and parents who would arrive within the half-hour.
I felt responsible, and with my “I’ve got it all together” pride, I showed my butt.
So, after I calmed down, cried a little (Okay fine, A LOT.), and realized how inane my behavior was, I started making my apologies one by one. It felt like they went on and on and on.
They did.
I’ve never made that mistake again.
I am CONFIDENT I will not make that mistake ever again.
But I did – once, and it is now part of my story.
I have made mistakes more than once in this process called home education. I have made a fool of myself, humbled myself and asked forgiveness. Repeatedly.
I’ve learned to be more flexible, generous and understanding by being anything but flexible, generous and understanding.
Live and learn.
2. Be content, but not concrete.
There are as many choices for homeschooling parents in the land of curriculum as there are bags of cereal at Walmart.
Seriously.
And while you want the absolute best for your children, that “best” is going to be different for each family.
So, first things first, stop looking at what “Suzy” or “Carla” or “Belinda” bought because you are buying for YOUR kids, not theirs.
Know your kids and meet their needs and don’t worry about whether it is approved by anyone else.
In the beginning, we ordered strictly from Sonlight.
Then, we didn’t care for their writing program and added in The Write Foundation beginning in 6th grade.
We decided that Saxon and Teaching Textbooks wasn’t working for us as a math program, so we ditched it. We liked the natural flow and clear instruction Alpha Omega Publications’ Monarch Math curriculum had, so we decided to stick with it.
So now, we have a hodge-podge of different curriculum from multiple places, and that’s FINE because it’s what works for us.
We understand choices are dynamic. If it stops working, we’ll change again. And, if we change it’ll be because it’s not working.
We wouldn’t make a change because some friend of ours (online or off) switched over, and we felt pressure that we weren’t offering the best for our kids if we didn’t switch too.
Peer pressure should NEVER affect your curriculum choices.
If it works for your kids, be content with it.
If it doesn’t work for your kids, change it.
Simple.
3. Be honest about your fears.
Nothing can rip your confidence apart faster than fear, but the truth is most of our fears are unfounded.
Make a list of your biggest fears and then, tackle them one by one.
When I began homeschooling in 2004, I faced several of my fears, one after the other.
That simple action helped me erase the fear of homeschooling so I could gain the necessary confidence to do what my older daughter needed.
But those fears don’t always disappear forever.
There are other fears that sneak up here and there, and they can slowly suck away all the confidence a homeschooling momma has built up over years.
So, don’t hide those fears away.
Express them.
Tell your husband, your parents, your homeschool friends, your public school friends, and your children (if appropriate).
Blog it already!
Ask for help, guidance, experiential wisdom, and LISTEN.
Build a strong support network and be REAL with them, and better yet, let them be REAL with you.
When we try to hide our fears, they wrap their talons around us and threaten to pull us down – suffocating us.
But, when we are willing to be transparent, then others will rally with us. You’d be surprised by the many people who will walk alongside you and encourage you toward YOUR goals, regardless of their own personal goals.
Confidence comes in many shapes and sizes.
There are personal confidence issues that extend beyond homeschooling. Some of us don’t like how we look, talk, think, sound, work, etc., and those issues can overflow into how confident we are in homeschooling.
But, don’t let those things cross over.
They are unrelated.
If you chose to homeschool, then be confident in the choice. There is so much available to you that there is no question you have that will go unanswered.
Nope, not even Algebra!
Head up.
Shoulders back.
You got this.
I’m proud of you. I’m proud of me. We’re in this together.
About the Author: Heather Sanders is a work at home mom who homeschools her three children. If you’d like to learn how to pursue your passions and earn an income while staying home with your kids, subscribe today.